Tony Alford’s days numbered at Notre Dame?

After a disappointing end to the season, there have been many Notre Dame fans who have been speculating on possible changes to Brian Kelly’s staff.

Most of the chatter has centered on Kelly and Jeff Quinn being reunited with one another in some capacity after Quinn was fired during the middle of his fifth season at Buffalo. Quinn spent several years with the Irish head coach at Grand Valley State, Central Michigan, and Cincinnati.

A subtraction from the staff could be a possibility as well though.

With Jim McElwain taking the job at the University of Florida, Colorado State is now looking for his replacement and Irish running backs coach and recruiting coordinator Tony Alford has been mention as a possible option. Alford was rumored to be looked at by CSU a couple of years back before they hired McElwain.

Just hours after the job officially became open, Alford was already receiving help from the masses to prove he would be a strong choice to get the position.

Urban Meyer, Brian Kelly and Jack Swarbrick ALL called @CSUFootball today’s pushing Tony Alford for the Rams HC position. Strong stuff.

Alford being a candidate makes a lot of sense. The former running back played four years for the Rams and helped his alma mater win it’s first bowl game back in 1990 against Oregon. His wife has family in that area and his mom lives near Colorado Springs as well, so all the ties are there.

Would Colorado State be willing to hire a coach who has yet to be a coordinator in his career though? Alford was passed over for the job by Kelly first by Chuck Martin and this past year by Mike Denbrock. That may be a gamble that CSU might not want to take, especially with the good shape the program is in after the great job McElwain did in his three years there.

If they do end up taking that change, losing Alford would be a big blow to the Irish.

He’s routinely voted as one of the top recruiters in the country by Rivals and the other recruiting services. If he were to go to CSU, Tevon Coney, a big piece to this year’s Irish class, would more than likely opened up his recruitment. The Irish would also be fighting an uphill battle trying to add another running back to this year’s class.

Losing Alford wouldn’t only hurt on the recruiting front. He’s the longest tenured member on the staff, having been the only coach left over from the Charlie Weis era. You can easily credit him with the maturation of Tarean Folston, who appears to be set to have a monster junior season in 2015. He also has a very good relationship with Greg Bryant, who showed strides at the end of the season.

Time will tell where Alford ends up being come next season. It would be a tremendous opportunity for him to get a head coaching job and you can’t argue against that, but the selfish side of me wants him to remain in South Bend for many years to come.

A Dame’s View — Notre Dame vs. Louisville

By: Bree Fromage

Once again, my predication about Notre Dame beating Northwestern was wrong. Might I add that I hate being wrong… I should stop making predications after consuming a bottle of wine. But it does help me cope with my depression after losing to a team that Notre Dame should have beaten. Going for two when it made absolutely no sense still haunts me… Where is that bottle of wine?!

Well, I don’t know much about Notre Dame/Louisville football, but what I do know is this week’s edition of “A Dame’s View” is all about Kentucky. Truth be told, I did not know that Louisville was in Kentucky until this week. But it does make sense considering how everyone pronounces it:

loouhvuhl

So, it got me to thinking…why do they pronounce “Louisville” like “Loo-A-Vul”? Then I remembered…it is in KentuckKFC LOGOy. When I think of Kentucky…I think of Kentucky Fried Chicken. The Original Deep Fried Chicken, hot and tasty! Whenever you take a bite of that chicken…it’s so juicy and greasy…much like Bobby Petrino. Meanwhile, the football team seems like they would be good at first but then they become a hot mess, like Bobby Petrino. However, I personally know that the taste of KFC’s deep fried chicken can cause people to inhale a wing in one bite… Maybe that’s how they get “Loo-A-Vul”, a mouth full of slop, like Bobby Petrino. Now I’m beginning to think the issue going on with our Notre Dame Football team is too much KFC fried chicken. After having a piece of KFC’s chicken, your hands get so greasy and I’m positive that is what is causing all those turnovers and fumbles. Yeah…I bet that’s it…definitely not Golson’s fault.

You know what? Louisville also makes me think of baseball bats…not a university with a football team. I think it’s called the “Louisville Slugger”…supposedly the original wooden baseball bat. Whatever that means…I just hear about those wooden baseball bats breaking all the time. Like a broken bat, the Notre Dame Football team currently looks like it is splintered into a million pieces. F9665ZIHQ72ZPCN.MEDIUM

It’s going to take A LOT more than glue to put it back together at this point. Maybe we can get some nails and a hammer to put the team back together? Or maybe they should just hook up with players on the volleyball team. It helped Bobby Petrino bounce back.

Louisville has been waiting for this matchup against Notre Dame for several decades. I heard a rumor that Louisville is trying to get all their fans to do a red out at the game this Saturday. Little do they know that they only red that they will see is when Notre Dame tramples over their bleeding hearts when they score touchdowns. I do believe that Notre Dame will come up with this win and send Louisville crying home. GO IRISH!

The Down the Tunnel Radio Show – Placing Blame and Holding People Accountable

-GoIrishGlory

Talking the embarrassing performance by Notre Dame yesterday and who was to blame. Lots of great callers.

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/downthetunnel/2014/11/17/the-down-the-tunnel-radio-show–placing-blame-and-holding-people-accountable

Irish NFL Performers – WEEK 10

Jesse J. @theshamrap

This is downthetunnel’s week 10 installment of our former Irish great’s performances in the NFL.

Week 10’s top performers:

ptt

Shembo was all over the field this week for the Falcons, there was rarely a defensive play that was made that he wasn’t around the ball in Atlanta’s 27-17 win over Tampa Bay, earning him this week’s Defensive Top Performer.

Calvin Johnson was making his return for Detroit, leaving one to only assume Tate and Riddick’s receiving numbers would decline. Think again. Sharing this weeks Offensive Top Performer(s), the duo of former Irish stars were as dynamic as ever, both scoring touchdowns capped by this eventual game-winner by Theo:

 

 

Other Notable Players
Anthony Fasano, KC, TE – 4 rec 32 yds
Sergio Brown, IND, FS – 2 tckls
Michael Floyd, ARZ, WR – 4 rec 47 yds 1 TD
John Carlson, ARZ, TE – 4 rec 14 yds
Robert Hughes, ARZ, RB – 1 rec 7 yds
Justin Tuck, OAK, DE – 3 tckls 1 tfl
Ian Williams, SF, DT  – 1 tackle
Jimmy Clausen, CHI, QB – 1-3 comp 11 yds
Darrin Walls, NYJ, CB – 2 tckls

Injured, Bye, No Stats, O-line
Harrison Smith, MIN, FS – bye
Robert Blanton, MIN, SS – bye
Jonas Gray, NE, RB – bye
David Bruton, DEN, SS – no stats
Tyler Eifert, CIN, TE – injured
Ryan Harris, KC, OT
J.J. Jansen, CAR, C
T.J. Jones, DET, WR – injured
Kap Lewis-Moore, BE, BAL – injured
Zack Martin, DAL, OG
Zeke Motta, ATL, FS – injured
Troy Niklas, ARZ, TE – no stats
Louis Nix III, HOU, DT – injured
Eric Olson, NO, OG
Trevor Robinson, SD, C
Kyle Rudolph, MIN, TE – injured
John Sullivan, MIN, C
Manti Te’o, SD, LB – injured
Chris Watt, SD, OG
Sam Young, JAX, OT
Stephon Tuitt, PIT, DT – no stats

A Dame’s View – Notre Dame vs. Northwestern University

By: Bree Fromage

Well, my predication about Notre Dame domination over ASU was a little off. It’s hard for me to predict when we have a quarterback that likes to turnover so often. But as many of you have said online, we have to forgive him. I have it on good authority from numerous students on Notre Dame’s campus that he even fumbles his books while walking out of classrooms. If only the defense were there to save him!!!!!

Anyway…I better get off my soapbox so he doesn’t have the chance to turn it over again before I’m done writing this article. I don’t know much about Notre Dame/Northwestern University football, but what I do know is this week’s edition of “A Dame’s View” is about unionization. The first thing I think of when unionization pops into my head is when there is picketing in front of a grocery store. Funny thing is that this is probably where most of these Northwestern players will end up once they are done with their NCAA football.  Question they will be asking the most is, “Do you want paper or plastic”?

paper_or_plastic

Speaking of that, this team couldn’t play their way out of a wet paper bag. I mean, they are part of the Big 10 Conference and we all know how pathetic that conference is… They played Michigan last week and lost to them!!!!! Even ESPN has Northwestern University listed as one of the worst college football teams in history…

There are only a handful notable alums hailing from Northwestern University, with the most known being Stephen Colbert. So, it’s time for me to give a “tip of the hat, wag of the finger” to the Notre Dame/Northwestern game.cr_10031_02

First, the tip of the hat to Northwestern’s last conference championship in 2000. 8-and-4 to win the Big 10! Unfortunately, for them…they were still outplayed by a 9-and-3 Notre Dame team coached by Bob Davie… Yes…a Bob Davie team.

Next….a wag of the finger to Notre Dame’s defense. When are you guys going to learn no matter how many times Golson turns it over and how close it is to the end-zone…that it is your fault?!?!?! I’m tired of you defensive players continuously getting the team back into the game and having Golson blow it for you!  Buck up and cover for him already!

A tip of the hat to Brian Kelly, who has been fantastic helping Golson keep his cool on the sidelines despite turning the ball over several times.  We all know the best way to play is to play loose and Kelly is helping Golson do that by agreeing to everything he says after Golson screws up. Then yelling at the player Golson was throwing to instead of the idiot who threw the interception.  This kind of coaching is easy to see on the sidelines as Golson laughs the whole time even though his mistakes are costing the team dearly.  Way to keep him cool, coach!

A wag of the finger to Northwestern’s mascot the Wildcat.

125px-NorthwesternWildcats Good job picking the most ferocious animal you could find out there for your school.  It doesn’t matter if it’s the most generic mascot in all of sports.  Hell, even the high school in High School Musical had a wildcat mascot.  Better than me try to explain it to you; I’ll let Urban Dictionary do the work for me:

Screen Shot 2014-11-10 at 8.41.56 PM (1)

In the end, we all know that Notre Dame is going to win this game. Frankly, all the Golson lovers need this win especially against this really strong 3-and-6 team. I’m looking forward to reading all the comments online saying how awesome he is and defending him. Even though this girl who knows nothing about football at least knows that he has cost us one game and almost several more games. But at the end of the day, GO IRISH!

The Down the Tunnel Radio Show – Debacle in the Desert

-GoIrishGlory

The Down the Tunnel Radio show returns as we look back at the devastating loss to Arizona State and where the Irish go from here. We also talk about the Down the Tunnel Tailgate that will take place this weekend for the Northwestern game.

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/downthetunnel/2014/11/09/the-down-the-tunnel-radio-show–the-debacle-in-the-desert

Rumble in the Desert – A Weekend Preview

-GoIrishGlory

Sun Devils

Its elimination weekend in college football as there are multiple marquee games around the country between playoff contending teams. Among those games is Notre Dame traveling to take on Arizona State in a high profile top 10 matchup that will help dictate the rest of the season for both teams. Both the Irish and the Sun Devils enter the contest ranked 10th and 9th respectively. Each team only has one loss on their record with the Irish losing a close game at Florida State, while Arizona State got absolutely steamrolled by UCLA earlier this season. Both teams are desperate for a marquee win to add to their resume. Arizona State’s best win so far this season is against 17th ranked Utah while Notre Dame has yet to defeat a top 25 team yet this season and whose “best” win came against a four loss Stanford team. Both teams need no extra motivation for this one. Its pretty simple what lies ahead. The winner stays alive in the College Football Playoff picture. The loser is eliminated. Brian Kelly has a history of getting his team ready to play in big games away from Notre Dame (except Alabama but lets just forget that happened) and a win against Arizona State on the road would be a huge boost the Notre Dame’s playoff hopes.

Notre Dame’s offense is firing on all cylinders right now. While the game against Navy was much closer than most had expected or hoped, it was not due to a lack of production on offense. Since going on a three game streak of having huge turnover problems earlier in the season, Everett Golson is taking much better care of the football having thrown only two interceptions in the last two games. The key for the Irish offense against the Sun Devils this weekend is getting the running game going early to set up the play action pass to attack downfield and take advantage of the stable of athletes that Notre Dame has at the wide receiver position. Arizona State’s defense utilizes their safeties heavily in the running game so if the Irish are able to successfully run the ball and continue to suck in the safeties to play the run, they can then beat them over the top with the play action pass that is such a vital part of the Irish offense. Tarean Folson has burst onto the scene for the Irish in the past three games and he should be able to continue his success against the Sun Devil run defense that is giving up over 180 yards on the ground per game ranking 88th nationally.

folston navy

Somewhat similarly to the Irish defensive scheme, Arizona State loves to bring pressure and blitz the quarterback early and often. The Sun Devils send five or more pass rushers on 55 percent of their plays which is second nationally. Everett Golson has gotten much better in noticing and adjusting to defenses blitzes and it will be vital this week against a very aggressive defense that will do their best to force turnovers. Golson is the best quarterback the Sun Devils have faced so far this season however and he should be able to move the ball effectively. UCLA’s Brett Hundley shredded Arizona State for 355 yards passing and four touchdowns with zero interceptions in their blowout win earlier this season and I see no reason why Golson can not have the same success. The Irish offensive line has really come together since the Florida State game and is playing their best football of the season. If Notre Dame can protect Golson like they have in recent weeks, he should have plenty of time to find Will Fuller, Corey Robinson, or CJ Prosise for big plays. With Fuller, Robinson, and Prosise all being dangerous threats, the Sun Devils are not able to put their focus on just one which will leave a lot of one-on-one match ups down the field. Simply put, with how successful the offense has been for the Irish, they should have no problem scoring a lot of points.

golson

The play of the Notre Dame defense will dictate whether or not Notre Dame wins or loses this game. After looking like one of the best defenses in the country early on in the season, shaky performances against North Carolina and Navy have brought expectations for the defensive unit down a bit. Add the loss of starting middle linebacker and leader of the defense Joe Schmidt into the mix and it can be very understandable why many are nervous about how the defense will perform against one of the nations most potent offenses. Arizona State is 38th nationally in scoring averaging 34.4 points per game largely in part to their success throwing the football. The Sun Devils are 23rd in passing offense averaging 291 yards through the air per game. The big play threat for Arizona State is star receiver Jalen Strong who already this season has 57 receptions for 821 yards and 8 touchdowns. It is paramount for Notre Dame to not let Strong beat them as he is by far their best player on offense. Quarterback Taylor Kelly has not played particularly well in his last two games since returning from injury and has been sacked eleven times in the last two games. Sheldon Day and Jarron Jones have been doing a great job on the defensive line getting pressure on opposing quarterbacks and that should continue this week. Brian VanGorder will bring pressure early and often to rattle Kelly which has spelled trouble for Arizona State all season. Turnovers have been a big problem for the Sun Devils and its no secret that the Irish will do their best to force Kelly to make bad decisions which lead to take aways. Nyles Morgan will be making his first start at middle linebacker for the Irish and he will be responsible for all of the defensive calls. He played well last week when Schmidt went down and it will be interesting to see how he performs in his first full game on such a big stage. It is not reasonable to expect the Irish defense to completely shut down Arizona State. However they should be able to slow down the Sun Devil’s, who have struggled in the last two weeks against tough defenses.

defense

Prediction 

Get your guns ready folks because this one is going to be a shootout. Both of these offenses are very good units that are filled with skill players. What the game will come down too is which team makes the least amount of mistakes and which team is able to make just enough defensive stops. In the last few weeks Notre Dame’s offensive line has been playing their best football while Arizona State’s offensive line has struggled protecting Taylor Kelly. This will be the difference in the game. The young but aggressive defense of Notre Dame will play like they did against Florida State a few weeks ago and wreck havoc on Taylor Kelly making him make bad decisions. The defense will give up some big plays but overall they play an overall solid game. Golson and company continue to perform at a high level on offense and lead the Irish to victory. Notre Dame 38 Arizona State 30

Other Games Around the Country

5 Alabama at 16 LSU – LSU has already done Notre Dame one favor this season, handing Ole Miss their first loss of the season, and they will be looking to do it again. After looking pretty bad early in the season the Tigers are playing really good physical football and have been winning with good defense and a very physical running game. While Alabama gets all the respect from the talking heads because they are Alabama, when you look at who they have played they have not been all that impressive. Death Valley is a really tough place to play especially at night. LSU helps out Notre Dame yet again. LSU 23 Alabama 20

4 Oregon at 17 Utah- The Utes are fresh off a tough loss to Arizona State last week but their defense played one of their better games of the season holding the Sun Devils to only 19 points. They face another tough challenge this week as Marcus Mariotta and the Oregon Ducks come to town. Utah will play well and keep it close for a while but I just don’t see their offense scoring enough points to win. Oregon 37 Utah 24

7 Kansas State at 6 TCU – TCU is fresh off a tough game against West Virginia last week and looks to put another win over a tough opponent on their resume. Treyvon Boykin has played very well this season but struggled a bit last week against a West Virginia defense that has not been very good this season. Kansas State is one of the better defenses in the Big 12 which will provide for another tough challenge for TCU. Notre Dame fans are really pulling for Kansas State to win here. The Wildcats helped Notre Dame out in 2012 by losing and this season will again help out the Irish by winning. Kansas State 31 TCU 30

Irish NFL Performers – WEEK 9

Jesse J. @theshamrap

This is the first installment of a weekly thing we will be doing on downthetunnel.com (better late than never!), featuring our picks for the defensive and offensive Irish players of the week in the NFL. We will also display the weekly stats of all our former Notre Dame greats currently in the NFL.

Week 9’s top performers:

week 9 top performers

From a defensive aspect, get used to seeing the Vikings’ Smith on as the player of the week often. He has been a game changer for Minnesota since he came into the league.

Anthony Fasano ,despite modest numbers, gets the nod for the offense this week, pushed over the top with his “Butt TD”:

Other Notable Players
Robert Blanton, MIN, SS – 6 tackles
Sergio Brown, IND, FS -1 tackle
Michael Floyd, ARZ, WR – 4 rec 36 yds
John Carlson, ARZ, TE – 2 rec 19 yds 1 TD
Jonas Gray, NE, RB – 12 car 33 yds
Robert Hughes, ARZ, RB – 1 rec 18 yds
Prince Shembo, ATL, LB – 2 tackles
Justin Tuck, OAK, DE – 4 tackles
Stephon Tuitt, PIT, DT – 2 tackles
Ian Williams, SF, DT – 4 tackles

Injured, Bye, No Stats, O-line
David Bruton, DEN, SS – no stats
Jimmy Clausen, CHI, QB – bye
Tyler Eifert, CIN, TE – injured
Ryan Harris, KC, OT
J.J. Jansen, CAR, C
T.J. Jones, DET, WR – injured
Kap Lewis-Moore, BE, BAL – injured
Zack Martin, DAL, OG
Zeke Motta, ATL, FS – injured
Troy Niklas, ARZ, TE – no stats
Louis Nix III, HOU, DT – injured
Eric Olson, NO, OG
Theo Riddick, DET, RB – bye
Trevor Robinson, SD, C
Kyle Rudolph, MIN, TE – injured
John Sullivan, MIN, C
Golden Tate, DET, WR – bye
Manti Te’o, SD, LB – injured
Darrin Walls, NYJ, CB – no stats
Chris Watt, SD, OG
Sam Young, JAX, OT

Notre Dame’s Road to the Playoffs – Week 11

-Tom

Another week has gone by, and Notre Dame sits steady at 10 in the College Football Playoff standings.  They’re probably lucky to still be there.  They beat Navy this week, in a game that they had in full control until about 1:30 left in the 2nd Quarter, when Everett Golson threw an interveption as the Irish were trying to increase their 21 point lead before the half. 

At noon on Saturday I decided to get tickets to the game off StubHub (Thank you to whomever put their $125 field level seats up for $45 each). I booked a hotel room and drove light speed down I-95, getting to Landover around 1:30 before kickoff. I remember sitting there after Navy took the lead thinking that the Irish would pull it out, but this was not going to help them at all.  They dropped a spot in each major poll, and would have dropped in the playoff standings, had it not been for Ole Miss suffering their second loss of the season. 

Ironically enough, ND did get jumped by their next opponent, Arizona State.  I’m happy about this.  The Irish need to handle their business regardless, but it allows the Irish to obtain a quality win, something they desperately lack.  I think this Irish team can compete with almost anyone on any given Saturday, as they proved in Tallahassee a few weeks ago.  But their resume says otherwise to the playoff committee.  Here we go…

1. Mississippi State – 8-0 – SEC

Key games: 11/15 – Alabama, 11/29 Ole Miss, SEC Championship

Mississippi State continues to be ND’s best friend.  They will need to take out Alabama, and whoever they play in the SEC championship for the Irish to have any legit chance at this.

2.  Florida State – 8-0  – ACC

Key games: 10/30 – at Louisville, ACC Championship

FSU won a hard fought game against future ND opponent Louisville.  They are likely to win out the rest of their schedule.

3.  Auburn – 6-1 – SEC

Key games: 11/1 Ole Miss , 11/15, @ Georgia, 11/29 @ Alabama, SEC Championship

Auburn did the Irish a favor in taking out Ole Miss, but in the same breath hurt the Irish by winning.  They still have a tough slate to finish the season.

11. Ole Miss – 7-1 – SEC

Key games: 11/1 Auburn, 11/29 Miss St., SEC Championship

The biggest problem I had with the rankings was that there were 3 SEC teams in the top 4.  Not to take anything away from Ole Miss, but I thought the whole point of the playoff was to make it fair for everyone else.   

4. Oregon – 7-1 – Pac 12

Key games: 11/8 @ Utah, 11/29 @ Oregon State., Pac 12 Championship

The Ducks took over the last playoff spot after the Ole Miss loss and an impressive victory over Stanford.  Hopefully Utah can pick them off.  Either way, best case scenario for the Irish, beat ASU, ASU beats the Ducks in the Pac-12 Championship.

5. Alabama – 7-1 – SEC

Key games: 11/8 @ LSU, 11/15 Miss St., 11/29 Auburn, SEC Championship

Bama had a bye this week.  Still have to run a gauntlet to get into this thing. The Irish need them to lose to Mississippi State. A win or loss to Auburn does nothing to help ND.  It either strengthens Auburns position or helps Bama.

6. Texas Christian University – 6-1 – Big 12

Key games: 11/1 @ West Virginia, 11/8 Kansas State

WVU almost helped out the Irish in a huge way this weekend, but TCU was able to get by the Mountaineers.  TCU has a huge game againt Kansas State this week.  To help the Irish the most, TCU needs to lose to K-State and then K-state needs to lose to one of their other ranked opponents down the line.  TCU’s schedule is fairly easy from here on out.

7. Kansas State – 6-1 – Big 12

Key games: 11/1 Oklahoma State, 11/8 @ TCU, 11/20 @ West Virginia, 11/6 @ Baylor

K-State made a 2 spot jump this week after crushing Oklahoma State.  As noted in the TCU blurb, the Irish will be helped the most by a K-State win over TCU, and a loss down the road.

8. Michigan State – 7-1 – Big Ten

Key games: 11/8 Ohio State, Big Ten Championship

Michigan State had a bye this week.  They have their hardest remaining game this week against Ohio State.  We have to be Ohio State fans this week, although I know it will hurt people to do so.

9. Arizona State – 7-1 – Pac 12

Key Games: 11/8 NOTRE DAME, 11/28 @ #19 Arizona

Not much needs to be said.  This is Notre Dame’s playoffs right here…

So that is that.  This week we root hard for the Buckeyes, K-State, LSU and Utah. Hopefully Notre Dame gives me a reason to continue updating this post next week. Go Irish!

Agree? Disagree? Reach me on twitter @GetsThruBuckner

A Dame’s View — Notre Dame vs. ASU

By: Bree Fromage

As I predicted with my future maternal instincts, Notre Dame beat Navy.  However, I was wrong since College Game Day did not show it’s dirty face on campus.  I do have to say, those maternal instincts aren’t too bad considering I’m not a mother, pregnant nor do I plan on being any time soon.  Now I get to turn my attention to that dust bowl in Arizona.

I don’t know much about Notre Dame/Arizona State football, but what I do know is this week’s edition of A Dame’s View is all about jealousy.  Yes, believe it or not, women get jealous…very jealous.  I know many of the guys reading this right now are like, “No way! I’ve never seen a woman get jealous about anything!”, but it’s true, we get jealous. I completely admit, I’m jealous of Arizona State’s head coach, Todd Graham.  They have a motto at ASU that they “underachieve with style”. Have you seen the pretty accessories that guy wears?  First, that silver fox prowls the sidelines with those pretty sweatbands on his wrist.  You’re not a male cheerleader.  Take the wristbands off.   Second, he has that pretty little Britney Spears microphone like he’s getting ready to sing the chorus to “Hit Me Baby One More Time”. Todd Graham with Mic

Speaking of jealousy, you know Britney is jealous of Todd.  He has a prettier microphone than she does and he has bigger boobs.  However, as the song goes, “Just give me a sign.  Hit me baby one more time.”

Britney with Mic

So let’s hit you with another number – Arizona State does beat Notre Dame in one area.  If there was a Grace Hall on the Arizona State campus they would have the #1 lit up year around because Arizona State is the number one party school in the nation.  Unfortunately, that’s a title Notre Dame won’t be taking from them any time soon.  While the biggest news recently on the Notre Dame campus is a football player dating a porn star, it’s an every day occurrence on the ASU campus because half the girls that go there are porn stars.  We can’t win this battle, Notre Dame fans.  Notre Dame has 97 consensus All-Americans.  Courtney Simpson, who started at ASU and wore an ASU cheerleading outfit in one of her videos, has 206 total films on her resume!  The good news for students like Courtney and Elizabeth Hawkenson is ASU does not care.  As a matter of fact, Elizabeth was actually on scholarship at ASU and it wasn’t for Sex Ed., it was for Geology.

I gotta admit, having the #1 party school or most adult film stars isn’t the only thing ASU leads Notre Dame in.  The women that attend that school are hot.  I’m talking smoking hot.  They could turn me.  If you haven’t seen it, a couple ASU girls dressed as the women in the Blurred Lines music video for Halloween 2013, meaning they wore nothing.  They literally walked around campus in only high heels.   That takes guts, then again, the adult film correlation is starting to make more and more sense.  However, there are no blurred lines in this football game, which is why we are here.  Notre Dame is 3-0 against Arizona State, which would be the same number of fingers they hold up for that dumb pitchfork/shocker thing they do.  ASU Pitchfork

Don’t get me wrong, like many women; I am not opposed to the shocker every now and then, but not on the field.  It just doesn’t belong in football.   Which is why there will be no shocker this weekend and Notre Dame will win again.  It’s really about Heaven vs. Hell when you talk about Notre Dame and the Sun Devils.  If you all want to see a silver fox with dumb sweatbands and microphone dress with more accessories than the actors and actresses on campus then coach a team to a loss, this is the game for you.  ASU might talk trash now, but win or lose, I’m sure they will end up with egg on their face.  Go Irish!

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