Here is your woman’s perspective of the game coming up this weekend. So, I don’t know anything about Notre Dame/Navy football (and I don’t plan rapping about it like an idiot), but what I do know is…
I don’t like Navy’s head coach. He’s a whiner and a crybaby. You would think him and that sissy, David Shaw, were brothers from another mother. They always have something to complain about. You are a part of the Navy! Man up! We know David Shaw pouts like a 3 year old who needs a nap, but that does not mean you have to act like one, too. Seriously, I have cramps three times as bad as Navy’s football team and I don’t whine as much as….as…I don’t even know how to say his last name. It’s like a damn Seeing Eye chart at the DMV. Seriously, I couldn’t pass that eye test sober (Which I’m not right now…). Look for yourself… His name does have LOL in it which makes it much easier for me to make fun of him.
While on the topic of cramps, I wonder what color Gatorade Brian Kelly will have at the podium for his press conference Navy week. I kinda hope he ditches the Gatorade all together and just drinks goat’s blood. It’s close enough to Halloween to work.
When I think of Navy and Notre Dame that the most important thing that comes to mind are the fight songs. I love to “Shake down the thunder from the sky” and “Marching to victory,” but it’s hard to compete with the disco hit “In The Navy.” Seriously, who wouldn’t want to sail the 7-seas or put your mind at ease? It sounds like a wonderful vacation, which is pretty much what the Navy football team has been on. The last time they were ranked in the top-25 after the season was in 2004 and they were only ranked 24th. Their highest ranking ever was 2nd in both polls, which performed slightly better than their fight song which came in at #3 on the Billboard 100 in 1979. It was actually #1 on the Canadian RPM Top Singles list, but I’m pretty sure once you convert that from the metric system to ‘Merica system it comes out to #3 again. Looking over iTunes, the Notre Dame fight song is the song with the staying power and is ranked WAY higher than “In the navy” right now.
Staying on the number 3, let’s talk about the triple option: Vodka, Tequila and Beer. A formidable trio of awesomeness that makes any game enjoyable. If you drink enough, you might find Navy’s head coach cute…or you might mistake him for the goat mascot. I know I have a few times. It’s not that I have anything against Navy and I appreciate what they do for everyone, but let’s face it, the Notre Dame players are cuter and the type of guys you would want to have a real triple option with (Hey-Yo!). This game will basically be the SNL version of Chris Farly (Navy) vs. Patrick Swayze (Notre Dame). We got the moves, the looks and the skills to win this game.
Well, that’s a woman’s perspective of the Navy/Notre Dame game. I have no doubt College Gameday will be at this epic match up. If you tally up all the above categories, pretty sure Notre Dame is going to win by 17. By pretty sure, I’d put David Shaw’s Midol on it… I’m that confident. Go Irish!